The presence of the earth

“I have dropped in a heap on the earth, perhaps I will feel a touch on my hand.” - HafezI worked online for the majority of this weekend and am surprised and curious about by my ability to have come through this experience.  I feel a little weary but predominantly uplifted, grateful and nourished. My preconceived ideas about this and how I felt to be in the unknown, manifested in moments of anxiety and yet, overall, I was able to contain my mixed feelings well enough to meet this experience in open-hearted nervous excitement.

“I realised I surrendered to the ground and allowed myself to be supported and held by the warm embrace equivalent to that of a hand.”

Rachel Podger

I do not feel this would have been possible without the support of friends, colleagues and my fiancée and for the practice of mindfulness and all that I continue to learn about myself within my relationship with it.  Over the course of this weekend there were moments when I felt particularly drained of energy and lacked the resources to re-energise myself, particularly at the end of the first day.  I realise I struggled to find a peaceful place within me at the end of a long day and the remnants of adrenaline competed with my longing to stop and be present.  It wasn’t until I lay in a heap, flat out, on the grass, that I was able to let myself release this excess energy and to start and refuel and re-energise myself.I felt supported by the presence of the earth in a way that I had not previously experienced.  I realised I surrendered to the ground and allowed myself to be supported and held by the warm embrace equivalent to that of a hand.  This allowed me to release myself from my chattering mind and to trust that all was well.  I could take a breath and feel gratitude for all of my experiences of the day.  I was held within the body of time where for one moment all was well and I could release all expectation of anything being other than it was.  Peace.